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Intimacy Idiot

Intimacy Idiot Book Cover Intimacy Idiot
Isaac Oliver
Scribner
June 2, 2015
Hardcover
288

This big-hearted, laugh-until-you-can’t-breathe collection of personal essays, stories, and riffs on finding love and intimacy in New York City announces the arrival of a “a monstrous new talent” (New York magazine) in the vein of David Sedaris, Augusten Burroughs, and Tina Fey.

In this uproariously funny debut collection, award-winning writer and performer Isaac Oliver serves up a comedic cornucopia of sketches, vignettes, lists, and diaries from his life as a young, fanciful, and extremely single gay man in New York City. Whether he’s hooking up with a man who dresses as a dolphin, suffering on airplanes and buses next to people with Food From Home, or hovering around an impenetrable circle of attractive people at a cocktail party, Oliver captures the messy, moving, and absurd moments of urban life as we live it today.

Since moving to New York a decade ago, Oliver has pined for countless strangers on the subway, slept with half the people in his Washington Heights neighborhood, and observed the best and worst of humanity from behind the glass of a Times Square theater box office. He also rode the subway during Breastfeeding Awareness Week and lived to tell the tale. Culled from years of heartbreak, hook-ups, and more awkwardness than a virgin at prom and a whore in church (and he should know because he’s been both), Intimacy Idiot chronicles Oliver’s encounters with love, infatuation, resilience, and self-acceptance that echo our universal desire for intimacy of all kinds.

 

Review:

The star rating for “Intimacy Idiot” is probably a bit misleading here, as I rated based on the average of all of the pieces.  When it is good, it is very, very good.  I was laughing so hard it hurts at some points.  The problem is, when it is not good it falls completely flat.  The writing is on point in all of them, but sometimes I simply felt disinterested.

Isaac Oliver seems like someone I would love to hang out with.  He’s funny, intelligent, talented, and self-deprecating without coming across as though he wears a hair shirt and flogs himself every night before bed.  Twice on Sundays.  The stories manage to both give a peek into the world of gay dating, which is an unknown territory for some of us, while being relatable on so many levels to every single person reading it.  The ratio of familiar to foreign is absolutely perfect.

As I said above, it unfortunately fell flat in many chapters, but I would much rather focus on the enjoyable parts, of which there were many.  The book is at its heart a work of comedy, but it also evokes quite a sense of loneliness and longing.  It changes tone swiftly and seamlessly, always keeping the reader on their toes.  There is a natural talent for storytelling that shows in the writing, and I am anticipating reading more of Oliver’s works in the future.

I recommend “Intimacy Idiot” to anyone looking for a laugh and a well-written memoir.  The chapters range in format from stories to lists to poetry, so what fell flat for me may strike a chord with someone else.  The enjoyable parts make it well worth reading, no matter the issues you may have with other chapters.  If you in any way do not enjoy reading about casual sex, though, I would give the book a wide berth.

This review is based upon a complimentary copy provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

 

Content Warning:

As this is an adult book, there is no content warning.